Are you letting fear control your life?   Self-talk will help you to do anything you want when your use positive thinking, on the other hand, negative thinking can prevent you from doing anything you want.  The choice is yours.  Overcome fear systematically with  self-talk.  Once you realize what is causing your fear, you can move to self-talk  techniques to change the situation..

First let me share what self-talk is not.  It’s not some mumble jumble.  We do it all the time but we just don’t know it.  Unfortunately, most of our natural self-talk is negative.  Most of us believe in positive thinking, and that’s good.  But deciding to only think positively for the rest of your life won’t work.  After all we’re all humans and bound to slip up every now and again.   But positive thinking can work if your negative thoughts are immediately replaced with positive one.  Wanting to be a positive thinker isn’t enough, having a positive attitude isn’t enough. You need the positive words to go along with it.  What I’ve learned about self-talk is it’s not hypnosis or subliminal but a repletion of the positive ideas concepts and affirmations that you say, or listen to over a period of time.

Let me give you a couple of examples. Instead of getting out of bed in the morning and saying “I wish I didn’t have to get up,” with your new self-talk say “it’s a great day to be alive”.  Or for those of us that have  to make cold calls instead of saying “I’d really don’t feel like making calls today,”  with your new self-talk try saying  “I excited to make these calls because I know I will make a great new connection today”.  Remember your rephrasing your old self-talk with new ones.  One more example so I know you get the picture.  Instead of saying “I’m so tired today I feel like going to bed”,  with your new self-talk say “I have a lot of energy today”.

Now the changes won’t happen immediately or overnight.  This will take some practice and skill to change your thinking and mindset.  When your with another person you might want to use self-speak silently, when alone you can feel free say it out loud or even have a conversation with yourself.  But remember when you find yourself getting off track by negative thoughts creeping in regroup and get right back on path.

Use positive thinking and self-talk to reprogram your mind to think positive. Don’t let your conscious and subconscious mind tell you that something can’t be done. If you use self-talk, you’ll soon learn that you can do anything you want and succeed by being positive.   Use positive thinking and self-talk to stay in control. Tell yourself that when you master confidence and self-esteem you can master anything.

If this was helpful let me know.  Add a comment in the comment area below this  sentence.  Let me know if there’s anything else you’d like to know about self-talk.

You may have heard of the book “Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway” by Susan
Jeffers. Although this is not my favorite way of dealing with stress it does work and it
is a useful approach at times.  In my opinion this is the most stressful and difficult way to deal with your fears.
The idea is to consistently move beyond your own self limiting behavior.
For example let us say you are afraid of approaching people at networking events.
Your goal would be to gradually aim higher despite your fears. Here are the few approaches you can do over time
Attend a meeting with the goal of talking to just one new person.
Go to a meeting and this time initiate a conversation with three new people
without putting yourself under pressure to strike up a great conversation.

Self Talk and Stress

Self-talk refers to the dialogue that goes on inside your head when faced with conflict or life challenges or even simple day-to-day concerns. This aspect of yourself has a running commentary about everything you do. It never lets anything go by with out some comment, remark or evaluation.
Becoming aware of this process is the first step in taking charge of this part of yourself that can create a lot of unnecessary stress.

You’ll recognize these thoughts because you have heard them all your life; I’m not smart enough, something is wrong, I can’t do it, I never finish anything, this is too hard, change takes too long, etc. In effect you don’t need those people to tell you what to do anymore, they are living inside your own head!!!

How to make a change
First…awareness. You must become aware of the inner dialogue. Begin to notice when it shows up, what it is telling you.  Pay attention to what you thinkSee if you can start to recognize the repetitive nature of the thoughts.

Second…you don’t HAVE to react to the thoughts your mind presents you. It is a habit you can break with awareness. The moment you notice that it is just a THOUGHT and not a COMMAND you have a choice. You are in touch with your “observing self”. That gap or moment of awareness allows you to notice the thought and CHOOSE to do what you have always done or CHOOSE to do something different.